EXPOSE | To not look is to fail
“Without proper self-evaluation, failure is inevitable.” – John Wooden (a warning he made in Wooden: A Lifetime of Observations and Reflections On and Off the Court when our excuses interfere with our ability to evaluate ourselves.)
EXPLORE | Take a good look at yourself
They say that not knowing history will doom us to repeat it. So, not looking back and properly reflecting on the past is probably not wise. Equally as fatal is an improper consideration of the future, and not knowing or caring where our decisions will lead us. To ignore or be stuck looking in either direction are detrimental in their own ways.
Wooden is right. Our failure is certain if we choose to avoid proper reflection and examination. Therefore, having a healthy introspection will most likely prevent such a fate.
Simply described, introspection is “the act of looking within oneself.” It involves both what we’re thinking and feeling, but beyond just observation, we actually take the time to examine and evaluate.
Included in our considering the past and the future, is a good, hard look at where they intersect in the “here and now”. Indeed, having all three perspectives (past, present, and future) in view work together for our good. Looking inward will allow us to appropriate with care the benefit of hindsight and the expectation of what lies ahead.
Introspection is a more formal step toward understanding what we think and feel, and how we are to handle those emotions and thoughts.
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”
– Socrates
Wooden echoes the bolder statement made by Socrates that “the unexamined life is not worth living”. Which is to say, that a life worth living is only possible when examined. How could one argue that they are truly living if not for introspection?
EXECUTE | Practicing a healthy introspection
For some of us, this might come too easy. Self-reflection is constant, and too often cruel. Introspection is always in session, especially for us introverts, and can lead to berating ourselves over and over again. Here are a few ways to exercise a healthy self examination that allows us to look inside without becoming locked inside.
Reflect don’t critique
Overall, the process self-examination should be helpful and beneficial. We need to be aware that we’ve crossed the line when we’ve moved from observation and understanding to fault finding and condemnation.
“The key distinction is whether the reflection process is productive. Introspection is productive, rumination is not: it’s repetitive, negativistic, and often self-flagellating.”
– Rick Hanson, Ph.D.
Have a plan for your thoughts and feelings
Part of keeping free of rumination is to have a plan for any recurring thought or feeling. Rather than cycle through them again, decide what action you need to take. To break free of the loop you may find yourself in, force yourself to put an action to the thought or feeling. What is the first thing you need to do about it?
Ask ‘what’ not ‘why’
Asking ‘what’ questions will help you focus on the action that you need to take to reach a goal or solution. ‘Why’ questions tend to place too much attention on negative thoughts and feelings, which, relegate us to the ‘doom loop’ of obsessing on an issue rather than moving toward the solution.
“Using solution-focused questions has two benefits: It reveals potential answers to the problems and increases your confidence in your ability to solve future dilemmas.”
– Nir Eyal, author of “Hooked” and “Indistractable”
“As a man thinketh…”
The way we think has a substantial influence on how we live our lives. Proverbs 23:7 says that is how we know who we really are; by the way we think in our hearts: “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he…” (KJV)
Scripture should be the foundation for our thinking, such that we would ‘take every thought captive’ in order that right thinking would lead to live rightly.
1 Corinthians 11:31 dictates that we judge ourselves: “If we judged ourselves rightly, we would not be judged.” Both the Apostle Paul and Jesus point this out:
“Paul called for this self-examination every time we partake of the Lord’s Supper (1 Corinthians 11:28). All other righteous forms of judgment depend on this honest self-examination. That is what Jesus meant when He said, “First take the log out of your own eye” (Luke 6:42).”
– John MacArthur
No doubt, there may be emotions and thoughts that are best suited for a professional to help us evaluate, but self-evaluation is self-care, and we need to care for ourselves. A regular, healthy look at ourselves can be quite beneficial and refreshing–because a life worth living is only possible when examined.
Further Reading:
Introspection versus rumination
Discerning self evaluation
Examination speaks a thousand lies
4 simple introspection steps to boost self-awareness
Photo by Anthony Tori on Unsplash